Safe House was shown on DSTV last Sunday and I thought “what a joke” when one of the MI6 agents ordered a bottle of 1974 Chateau Petrus in a Cape Town restaurant. Until I saw Renee Dehn of the White Club deliver well over R1 million worth of wine to the Taj last week in a cardboard box. Indeed, there was a Petrus.

Even more shocking than learning that the CIA runs a safe house in the Swartland – probably someone in Washington misunderstood the nature of the Swartland Revolution – was to hear Denzel Washington expire, singing the praises of Pinotage. Or maybe he was in deep cover in the Swartland where the trick seems to be to source Pinotage from the Swartland Co-op, age in third fill barrels, label and sell for an order of magnitude more than you paid.