Does wine make you bisexual?

Two fascinating pieces of news from the UK this week.  The first from the Daily Mail which reports that strong Vodkas and tonic render women (especially) unable to distinguish symmetric from asymmetric faces in the opposite sex (presumably males).  Seems that the sexual attraction of British boys boils down to the symmetry of their faces, as ruby captain Mike Tindall, married to the queen’s granddaughter, confirms below.  I’m told he’s a total Adonis after a bottle of Smirnov, but would not argue the point with a teetotaller, either.

An asymmetric Mike Tindall

Meanwhile readers of the New Statesman will not be surprised to hear columnist Robert Webb mention “a friend at college who described himself as a ‘three-bottles-of-wine bisexual’ (those lucky, lucky boys!)”  What is surprising is that any sexual capacity survives after three bottles of wine.  Certainly not South African, I would venture.  It would have to be something effete, like a Liebfraumilch from the Pfalz.  Which is already highly suss.