SA wine critics may be classified into three groups: sighted luvvies who bank with Standard, buy on credit with Diners Club and who like to reward producers who give them free bottles and laugh at their jokes by rating their wines highly. Then there are the blind monkeys who insist on tasting blind to get the wrong answer. Then there are the party goers/bloggers who don’t understand the issues but cheers! anyway. At last a solution is at hand and it comes from an unlikely sweet source: Muskadel SA.

At the 12th annual Muskadel Awards function held recently, Badsberg was crowned winner with wines selected according to a novel algorithm. “Tasted blind, the wines are judged and scored according to a tried and tested points system. The uniqueness of the packaging also contributes to the final points tally and often means the difference between a gold or platinum award. Consumers can identify winning Muscats by the Gold or Platinum Muskadel SA stickers on the bottle.” Other winners included KWV, Orange River Cellars, Nuy and Bon Courage. The winning winemakers are shown above.

So its both sighted and blind, although I wonder whether they use the same judges to rate taste and packaging? For judging by the fashions sported by some tasters (think Angela and her saggy green tracksuit bottoms) oral prowess does not a GQ fashion editor make.

A similar system is used by Singapore Airlines to select wine for in-flight service. A trio of judges under Steven Spurrier is flown in luxury to Singapore to taste wines blind. Steve then looks at the labels and chooses the winners. The reason being that people who fly first class on Singapore wish to drink classed French growths and the customer is always right, even when she is wrong.

Could this be a solution for Platter to ensure that the wineries and brands owned by Diners Club director Reg Lascaris (who manages Platter from the boot of his Bentley) continue to get the five star ratings they so obviously deserve? Quite possibly.