R50: the Quantum of Pleasure

As SA closes in on France in 3rd position as UK wine supplier behind Australia and the US, SA exporters are set to make further gains as the penny drops that Zef rappers Die Antwoord are a Chav phenomenon that will ring more bells than the Hunchback of Nôtre Dame in Doncaster and Derby, just like they do in Durbanville. That Die Antwoord were jolling in a Kuns Kafee in Pampoenkraal (pumpkin homestead, the original moniker of Durbanville) on Friday night (entrance R50) comes as no surprise as the pips already supply Blighty with dora, much of it under Constantia brands like HMS Rattlesnake (Steenberg) and Buiten Blanc (Buitenverwachting). Even that producer of classic Syrah, Eagle’s Nest, is buying-in Sauvignon Blanc and it’s not news that Klein Constantia has well traveled grapes.

Die Antwoord frontman, Ninja

Die Antwoord frontman, Ninja

But the Answer from Die Antwoord’s Durbanville gig is that R50 is the quantum for an evening’s entertainment rather than the R140-R6000 FIFA is attempting to extort from SA residents (whose taxes will pay and pay for their fat cat profits) for match tickets. Entrance to World Cup matches should be free to SA taxpayers. Likewise, R50 seems to be the right price for a bottle of wine. My thoughts on wine prices on winenews. And some more thoughts prompted by a sensible UK wine pundit some months ago, below.

Jonathan Ray, wine pundit for the Daily Telegraph, claims that “aspirational thrift” is the latest buzzword among cash-strapped UK wine lovers although “frugalista” has perhaps more traction. Defined by the New York Times as “a person who lives a frugal lifestyle but stays fashionable and healthy by swapping clothes, buying secondhand, growing own produce, etc.” frugalista is predicted to become the nom de guerre of “recession warriors.”

As financial chickens come home to roost by the shed load, budget UK supermarket chains like Aldi report sales up 40%. All good news for SA exporters who have successfully colonized the cheaper end of the UK supermarket winelist in a country in which 90% of sales are sub £5. No surprise that Jonathan’s top white is a 2007 vintage Western Cape Chenin Blanc for £3.08 at Lidl. His tasting note: “amazingly, my favourite white. Serve well-chilled and enjoy its supple, rounded fruit.”

But you can do even better than that. Ned Halley’s The Best Wines in the Supermarkets 2009 (Foulsham, 2009) has another 2007 vintage SA Chenin for £2.85: Tesco’s SA Chenin Blanc which is rated 9/10. The tasting note states the obvious “how do they do it for the money? A Crisp, perky dry white with eager pear and peach fruit.”

How indeed? As of the £2.85 no less than £1.47 goes to the UK exchequer in tax, leaving £1.38 for Tesco’s profit, shipping, bottles, labels and a tip for the farmer on the Paardeberg who grew the grapes. UK wine tax is a scandal – the stuff is tax free in Germany, Italy and Spain while the French pay 2p a bottle.

Halley’s two cheapest wines are South African, with the Tesco SA red (8/10, “well-made, firmly fruity, party red”) all of £2.84. Writing in the Weekender (before it imploded, another victim of the global financial earthquake) importer Michael Fridjhon made the point “in the pre-1994 era most Cape wine producers really did believe that what they offered was world class. Their disappointment when they discovered their major markets didn’t entirely agree was largely compensated for by the currency. They were paid in sterling for junk wine, but the rand income helped maintain the illusion that what they sold was actually quite good.”

Clearly not all SA exports were junk, as Beyers Truter of Kanonkop fame, won the Robert Mondavi Trophy for International Winemaker of the Year at the London International Wine & Spirit Competition in 1991. The same award won by Gunter Brozel from Nederburg in 1985.

But the price point is well made, as SA has the keenest prices in Halley’s guide. Quality is obviously on an up as well, as two of the 27 wines rated a full-house 10/10 among the +2000 tasted hail from SA and on cue, the cheapest is an SA Cabernet Sauvignon for £5.15.

Quite why this wine is even exported is moot. “Deep-purple colour, whiff of caramel, softly ripe cassis fruit, long and mellow, clean, lipsmacking finish. All this and it’s also Fairtrade, organic and made without added sulphur products (very rare). A thoroughly modern wine, a great pleasure to drink and a true bargain.” Time for Woolies to import it back from UK associate Sainsbury’s.