Its been a mixed week for art in Cape Town. On Tuesday the UCT poo flingers association necklaced a bunch of paintings on campus while last night saw the opening of the Cape Town Art Fair at the International Convention Centre. A huge step up from last year’s fiasco with airconditioning, high ceilings, airconditionaing, Ruinart Champage, airconditioning, Mulderbosch wine and airconditioning. Did I mention the airconditioning?

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Here I am quizzing sculptor Ruann Coleman on his axe throwing technique. Perhaps he was in training for warding off any passing UCT poo flingers. I also met the elegant Christine from Buitenverwachting and asked if times were really so tough in the Constantia Valley it was necessary to use Riesling vines for braai wood. Or was this part of last season’s WOSA-led braaii initiative that collapsed foreign wine sales so effectively.

Where were WOSA I wondered idly, quaffing a free glass of Ruinart Champagne. For when luxurious freebees abound, WOSA fatcats are invariably in attendance. Of course making the connection between fine art and fine wine has yet to cross those Marie biscuit addled brains, lolling on their La-Z-Boy recliners in Dorp Street, languidly eyeing the Dylan Lewis statues, mercifully absent from the Fair, or perhaps I missed them.

But art resembling strangulated turds is a good investment in the new SA as at least its fire proof and the UCT poo flingers are unlikely to turn against one of their own. Toilet Art could become a huge new movement. No pun intended.