Hi, yes, can I speak to the Minister of Magic? Because now that this “Unicorn Tears” gin exists, I’m low key concerned that 2015 is the year Voldemort decided he was not so dead after all.

For all the ’90s babies who were also scarred for life by the scene where He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named drank unicorn blood, now you have a chance to scar the next generation all by yourself for the low, low price of $61! It may seem steep, but when you think about it, is a pretty cheap price to pay for the tears of the universe’s most majestic mythical beast and a true ~circle of life~ moment.

In case you were wondering what the tears of a unicorn taste like, the makers at Firebox claim that it is fantastical flavor mix of candied orange peels, juniper leaves, lemongrass, mint, and maple syrup. That’s not accounting for the aftertaste of your villainy, which I’m guessing no amount of chaser will ever quite take the edge off. Ah, well. At least that’s a little more subtle than walking around with a Dark Mark on your arm, amirite?