Spectator columnist Jeremy Clarke is my favourite magaziniste, starting from a high base. Here’s part of his dining experience from earlier this month: “Everything was wrong. The table was wrong: she wanted an alcove. The wine glasses were too thick. The waitress was too thick and she slopped too much wine into our thick glasses. And why was she putting bread on the table when we didn’t order any? Oldest trick in the book, that one, she said. They arrange four slices of supermarket brown bread in an oval dish, shove it on the table and the customers think it’s free. At the end of the night £4.95 for four slices of bread appears on the bill, by which time the customers are too drunk to read it properly, let alone complain.”
Restaurants (or On-Trade Consumers as a wine marketer might say) come in for a lot of stick. I asked a Cape Town restaurateur how he prices his wine after figuring a 400% markup was being applied. “For starters, anything sold in restaurants is disqualified” he began. But I bet Makro would be OK, it’s Shoprite he takes exception to.
Off-Trade is no better, with a disturbing rumour doing the rounds that owners of some bijou wine shoppes are joining forces and threatening producers with delisting if they continue to supply discounters like GetWine and SaleWine. Is Christian Eedes doing their PR? Is boutique retail on the brink of following bespoke bookshops, buried under an avalanche of electronic e-commerce? What does this mean for hard-pressed producers, battling to keep kop above cap as economic forces punch down hard. What should a producer do? Refuse to supply 500 cases to a supermarket or Johan Wegner or AJ in the hope of listing 5 bottles in an up-market eatery or bottleshop?
If boutique retailers are serious about banning discounted brands, they will have their hands full. Here is a list of some of the specials being GetWined at the minute:
Niël Joubert Sauvignon Blanc 2010 R32
Tokara Zondernaam Sauvignon Blanc 2009 R49
Diemersdal Sauvignon Blanc 2010 R52
La Motte Sauvignon Blanc 2010 R52
Simonsig Chenin Blanc 2010 R37
Pierre Jourdan Tranquille 2010 R37
Haute Cabriere Pinot Noir/Chard 2010 R63
Leopards Leap Chardonnay 2010 R35
Tokara Zondernaam Chardonnay 2009 R49
De Grendel Rosé 2010 R39
De Vallei Annerosé Pinot Noir/Chard 2010
Longridge MCC Brut 2007 R55
Simonsig Kaapse Vonkel 2008 R79
De Grendel Merlot 2008 R75
Diemersdal Pinotage 2009 R65
De Grendel Op die Berg Pinot Noir 2008 R119
Leopards Leap Cabernet/Merlot 2008 R40
Hermanuspietersfontein Kleinboet 2007 R87
Rupert & Rothschild Classique 2008 R89
La Motte Millenium 2007 R89
Tokara Zondernaam Cab Sauv 2008 R65
Annaberg Syrah R75
La Motte Shiraz 2008 R105
